> Two builders (Chris and James) are seated either side of a
table in a
> pub when a well-dressed man enters, orders a beer and sits
on a stool at
> the bar. The two builders start to speculate about the
occupation of the
> Chris: - I reckon he's an accountant.
> James: - No way - he's a stockbroker.
> Chris: - He ain't no stockbroker ! A stockbroker wouldn't
come in here!
> The argument repeats itself for some time until the volume
of beer gets
> better of Chris and he makes for the toilet.On entering
the toilet he
> the suit is standing at a urinal.
> Curiosity and the several beers get the better of the
> Chris: - Scuse me.... no offence meant, but me and me mate
> what you do for a living?
> Suit: - No offence taken ! I'm a Logical Scientist by
> Chris: - Oh ! What's that then ?
> Suit: - I'll try to explain by example ...Do you have a
goldfish at home?
> Chris: - Er ... mmm ... well yeah, I do as it happens!
> Suit: - Well, it's logical to follow that you keep it in a
bowl or in a
> pond. Which is it?
> Chris: - It's in a pond!
> Suit: - Well then it's reasonable to suppose that you have
a large garden
> Chris: - As it happens, yes I have got a big garden!
> Suit: - Well then it's logical to assume that in this town
if you have a
> large garden then you have a large house?
> Chris: - As it happens I've got a five bedroom house...
built it myself!
> Suit: - Well given that you've built a five bedroom house
it is logical
> assume that you haven't built it just for yourself and
that you are quite
> probably married?
> Chris: - Yes I am married, I live with my wife and three
> Suit: - Well then it is logical to assume that you are
> with your wife on a regular basis?
> Chris:- Yep! Four nights a week!
> Suit: - Well then it is logical to suggest that you do not
> Chris: - Me? Never
> Suit: - Well there you are! That's logical science at
> Chris: - How's that then?
> Suit: - Well from finding out that you had a goldfish,
I've told you
> about your sex life !
> Chris: - I see! That's pretty impressive... thanks mate!
> Both leave the toilet and Chris returns to his mate.
> James: - I see the suit was in there. Did you ask him what
> Chris: - Yep! He's a logical scientist!
> James: - What's that then?
> Chris: - I'll try and explain. Do you have a goldfish?
> James: - Nope
> Chris: - Well then, you're a ******
Q: My husband wants a threesome with my best friend and me.
A: Obviously your husband cannot get enough of you! Knowing that there is only one of you he can only settle for the next best thing your best friend. Far from being an issue, this can only bring you closer together. Why not get some of your old college roommates involved too? If you are still apprehensive, maybe you should let him be with your friends without you. If youâ€™re still not sure then just perform oral sex on him and cook him a nice meal while you think about it.
Q: My husband continually asks me to perform oral sex on him.
A: Do it. Semen can help you lose weight and gives a great glow to your skin. Interestingly, men know this. His offer to allow you to perform oral sex on him is totally selfless. This shows he loves you. The best thing to do is to thank him by performing it twice a day: then cook him a nice meal.
Q: My husband has too many nights out with the boys.
A: This is perfectly natural behaviour and it should be encouraged. The man is a hunter and he needs to prove his prowess with other men. A night out chasing young single girls is great stress relief and can foster a more peaceful and relaxing home. Remember, nothing can rekindle your relationship better than the man being away for a day or two (itâ€™s great time to clean the house too!) Just look at how emotional and happy he is when he returns to his stable home. The best thing to do when he returns home is for you and your best friend to perform oral sex on him. Then cook him a nice meal.
Q: My husband doesnâ€™t know where my clitoris is.
A: Your clitoris is of no concern to your husband. If you must mess with it do it in your own time or ask your best friend to help. You may wish to videotape yourself while doing this, and present it to your husband as a birthday gift. To ease your selfish guilt, perform oral sex on him and cook him a delicious meal.
Q: My husband is uninterested in foreplay.
A: You are a bad person for bringing it up and should seek sensitivity training. Foreplay to man is very stressful and time consuming. Sex should be available to your husband on demand with no pesky requests for foreplay. What this means is that you do not love your man as much as you should; He should never have to work to get you in the mood. Stop being so selfish! Perhaps you can make it up to him by performing oral sex on him and cooking him a nice meal.
Q: My husband always has an orgasm then rolls over and goes to sleep without giving me one.
A: Iâ€™m not sure I understand the problem. Perhaps youâ€™ve forgotten to cook him a nice meal.
A forum community dedicated to all SEAT owners and enthusiasts including the Arosa, Ibiza, Cupra R, Leon, Cordoba, Alhambra, Toledo, Altea and Exeo. Come join the discussion about modifications, classifieds, troubleshooting, maintenance, and more!